If you watched the
Rock of Love reunion, you know that isn't quite the rock of love that Bret had thought. Now we can bring you the full story from Jes' perspective. Jes tells us about the only time she talked to Bret in the six months between the taping of Rock of Love and the reunion. She lets us know what she really thinks of Bret, what she's up to now and why she thinks Heather should have won.
Earlier, you told me that you talked to Bret just once between the taping of the show and the reunion. Tell me about that conversation.It was never a direct phone call. His manager called me and connected me with Bret. But before that, I had this cowboy hat that Bret gave me in Mexico and his manager called me: "I need his hat back, can you ship it to this address?" Oh, and you want me to pay for it, too? Great. That's why I just kind of lost it on the reunion show. He had someone call me and connect me with Bret, who then asked, "Do you want to come to the St. Louis show?" It's like no, I don't. He extended that offer to me, but I know he did the same thing for Rodeo and Brandi. He threw that point in my face at the reunion, but I didn't bring that up: Brandi was there and Rodeo was there, so it wasn't as big of a secret as it needs to be. That doesn't make me feel special.
Did you think going into it that this would be something that would last? That the six months would be filled with phone calls and text messages?When I first started the show, I even said, "I have no expectations." I made that clear. But then once the show ended, once the cameras were off, the vibe was totally different. I could see that the situation was: go your separate ways.
Did that disappoint you?No. I was bitter toward it by the end. People s*** on us for being there for the wrong reasons, but I wondered if Bret was the one that was there for the wrong reasons.
If you didn't have any expectations, why even do the show? Most of the girls at least expected to attempt to look for love...That's the thing. I was approached by someone in casting. I was bartending and they drilled me: "You have to go, you have to go." I blew off my first audition and they called me: "Where are you?" So I went on the show and I just did it for the experience. Let's see what happens, was basically my attitude.
Much was made about you letting your guard down. That seemed to start on your first solo date with Bret when he played you the song onstage. Were you indeed falling for him at that point?No. The whole entire thing was awkward. It looks like I'm gazing into his eyes, but really, it was uncomfortable. Like: I'm trying to have a serious conversation with you and you're serenading me. He agreed, too. Later he said, "I probably shouldn't have sung to you before we had an actual conversation." Yeah, probably not.
But it really did seem like you were into him. You cried in Cabo when he presented you with the needle that he'd need you to revive him with, should he fall into a coma.After five weeks, I was mentally, physically and emotionally worn out. This guy is sitting here going, "If I go into a diabetic coma, shoot this in my ass or I could die." This was after five weeks of dealing with this s*** and then hearing that from someone you like as a person? It just made me lose it. Like, "I can't f***ing deal with it." Don't get me wrong, I cared about him as a person. But I was emotionally drained. I was done with it.
Do you regret being so competitive with Heather?Yeah, I do. There were reasons we made it to the end, but now I feel bad because I feel like I stopped Heather from getting what she wanted if the potential was there.
Because you said on the reunion that you thought she should be with him.And I truly do after watching the show. Just seeing how they interacted on the set of the reunion, they're still laughing. They have those stupid inside jokes that no one else gets.
You said at one point that you got to know Bret "sexually." Did you have sex with Bret?Absolutely not. Absolutely not.
It's kind of bad-ass of you to go on the reunion and be completely honest about your feelings. I think a lot of people would have played along.I'm not having it. I'm not putting on a facade. Before the show, I asked the producers, can I do it? Can I flip the script and say what I have to say? And they said, "Do it." I ran with it and that was me.
So you go to the reunion, and you're feeling, what? Resentment?When I first got the phone call about the reunion, I didn't want to go because I didn't want f***ing drama with the girls. I didn't want to start it up again. To me, I was mentally and physically done with the drama and done with the show. I just didn't want to bring it back into my life six months later. But I did end up showing up. I saw some of the girls and it immediately put me at ease. I had a different vibe of energy come over me. I was scared because of the girls. I didn't have resentment for Bret or anything, I just went to say what I wanted to say.
So you go to the reunion and you're worried about the drama with the girls, but who else besides Lacey did you have to worry about? Heather?Well, she and I talked very soon after the last episode filmed and just hashed it out. I apologized for saying the things I did. We've been emailing each other back and forth. I found out that she's not dancing and I'm proud of her. I have a lot of respect for that. Heather and I understand that we said things we might not normally say in a different situation. I think she's a great girl and I consider her a friend of mine.
While on stage [in a bit not shown on TV], Bret asked you to dinner on stage and you said that your flight was leaving at midnight. True?Yeah. My flight left at 11:50. I was being 100 percent dead honest. I wasn't there to rekindle anything. To me, it is what it is.
How far removed are you at this point? If Bret called you tomorrow in search of closure, would you talk to him?If he wanted to call me and ask about my thoughts, I would tell him straight-up: "I'm not bitter towards you. I'm not holding a grudge. This is what I think, take it or leave it."
And so what's your relationship status now?I'll say I've moved on. Definitely.
And what's coming up for you? You do hair, right?I'm a licensed hair stylist, but I'm not working in a salon. I'm just bartending. I was working in this salon for like six years and I was the head color educator for the company. I did all that by the age of 22 and I never had a life. So recently I figured, "Screw that, it's time to have a life." But in terms of other things, I'm doing club appearances. I'm endorsed by a clothing company. I might come out with my own line. We're gonna call it J Rock.
What about the entertainment industry? Are you going to stick with it?If I can, yeah. I don't know if I'd do acting, though. If I could do modeling, I'd totally do that.
Overall, was your experience on the show bad?It had its good points and it had its bad points. It was a good experience because I learned about myself and met some cool people. Would I ever do it again? Absolutely not. I'll make appearances on a show, but I'll never go all-out like this again. No way.
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